Wednesday, December 23, 2015

Long Distance Boy-Girlfriend Relationship (BGR)

Tediaaaaa. Corny right? I was scrolling #lovedone's Instagram and suddenly I started to noticed something weird there. So, today's post is wrote up emotionally. I might get high due to some crazy and mixed up feelings. Just hoping he'll see right through this entry.

The biggest challenge is the distances. Sometimes I feel like a fool for being alone and there's no one to turn to. I can't simply give a call to him because he also got his own work's commitment. I proud of that as well, since I'm a  big girl now. I think I can be mature enough compare to early days. The key is trust. But the damn things is, I can get impulsive so easily. We were doing good on our own when my mood swing suddenly turn on. If that is happened, I used to turned off my phones, deactivated my Facebook, blog and Instagram and any other way of communication medium. I don't know. It just happened in that way. I guess that is the best way for me to calm down. Seem siaw right? Cutting all way to get connected for the sake of clear heads off. But then, when both of us were in Malaysia, we both try to avoid to talk about any sensitive issues that might lead us into trouble.

His job nature requires he's meet and catch up with ladies and sometime I felt insecure. There's is a friend of mine ever said this when I was upset,

"Ask a pray to Allah, the Almighty. Because he is the key keeper towards his servant's heart"

I'm sicks of hearing people keep told me that our BGR won't and will never work out because he is non-Muslim. To be honest, I felt exactly in that way sometimes. There is a moment when I feel like I really need to put an end on this, walk away out of his life and give up on him. But I can't also turn my back on him because there is voice inside of me whispering, if Allah wanted to grant him with hidayah, He can grant him as he wish. 

When he isn't around in Malaysia, I wonder how is he doing? Can he really be loyal to me? And I'm stressing out alone here and start to feel insecure once again. I'll be silly by doubting him over and over.

Babe, there future ahead us is isn't clear. Being with you all these year was the greatest moments ever happened in my life and I want you to know that I'll never give up on you. Let's put an ultimate trust in Allah. Hey! Check up the birthday post 14weeks ago nau. You want to die is it? 

I Love You, Baby

Monday, December 21, 2015


All praise is due to Allah SWT, Alhamdulliah. The 14th weeks has been wrapped up and I'm in study week. And not to mentioned, I still got Individual Test for the subjects electronic Records. Took me long enough before I get the freedom. Last paper  is on 11th January 2016. *sigh*
Yesterday's night, there is something terrible happened to me, technically it does happened to Kak Syada. We've taken Html subject for this semester and we need to upload the final projects to our lecturer. It was limited coverage and the senior recommended us to upload it through UiTM's wifi line. So I, Faezah and KAk Syada went to library for the sake of uploading it. 

At 8.15 pm, I started to whined as I'm starving and Kak Syada need to leave for a while to settle the Commander's stuff with her other friends. so, she just stopped by and help me out with my individual assignment. She does almost all things, when I started to messed up things. I drag my folder but I paste it nowhere. -_-". Told yaaa I'm starving. She ended up uploaded assignment on my behalf. She taught me how to login into server with all the port, passwords and all the procedures. Then, she left me and Faezah to finished up our works and we're up to a promise of having late dinner together on 10 pm.

After she left, I turn my focus on my assignment by putting aside my phone. I'll not even peep on my phone once I'm on my assignments. Clock is tickling. Suddenly, Faezah showed me her handphone, showing a Class group's  Whatsapp conversation which then caused me speechless and  my brain was hang. About 2-3 minutes, me and Faezah stares to each other and don't really know what to do. I called Kak Syada and when she spoke to me, I can really tell she was crying. At that moment, I was about the curse out loud when Kak Syada said

" Ain jangan cakap apa2. Biar akak jawab."

Screenshot of the earlier conversation. I'd only took the most polite one. There's vulgarities and immoral way of talk through it. Siaw

ACCIDENTALLY, Kak Syada deleted the folder at the server. Yes, all of it( That's includes hers and our as well). It was accident and she didn't do it on purpose. I was beside her, and of course I was looking at her because I don't know how to upload our projects into the server. There's a girl taught Kak Syada and she just followed the steps. Okay, it's her fault but I don't think spitting a cursed to her with means curses and vulgarities will eventually  solves the messes. Why can't people being irrational at this rate? I'd be mad as well if I was knowing there is about 3 hours left for uploading the project before the time is off when uploaded projects in gone, for sure I'll go mad. But my madness is definitely not to the extend of cursing someone with those F****** shit words. Why they should tekan her even more after she admit her mistake and willing up to take the responsibilities for the whole class.

At one point I'm glad that kind of things happened as well. At least I know who can be truly friends or just a damn-shit-fake people with self bloody individualism to score that so called Dean List without any consideration towards other. This is stupid, I can't believe there is pathetic people to ever wanted  apply kasta tradition in University. OHHH. I'm good with score, so I'll be in A class and since you're bad, so stay at class B. Lame mehh! Wake up your ideas mate. Knowledge is Allah's. I know you strives to get it, but don't be way to arrogant. 

I re-checked my projects then rushed towards's Kak Syada's home. She looks terrible and not even take off her tudung. Sat at the corner of her house while texting and tried to reach Sir( keep apologizing to the other classmate as well). We're helping to re-upload the classmate's projects and then Ida and Faezah came as well to helps.  We left Kak's house around 2 am. We ended up having nothing for our late dinner, not even supper because everyone seems to lost their appetite. That's including me okay!

Sometimes, I prefer to use vulgarities and mean words in English rather than Malay. No offences, but Malay words somehow can be cruel enough. Maybe it is because Malay is our main proficiency of communication? Well, I don't know. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't like I'm encouraging you to curse or what, just be sensitives towards others. Don't be selfish. Whatever it is, no matter who'd have spoken those words towards Kak Syada, well done peeps. That will be never something I'll forget in hurry.  
It always better to know our own enemies rather than friends who pretended to be nice in front of us, but being such as bitch women on our back.

Sunday, November 08, 2015


Previously, on 29th of October 2015, I went to Petrosains, KLCC after got a called from Kak Izzi. After 4 times applied, I finally being accepted into Petrosains. It took about a year. I applied through online before, but none of them get me through until I made up my mind to drop by the form by myself. Don't get confused. I applied the post as part time since my class wasn't pack as I compressed my schedule ( I did mentioned in my previous post). 

The last batch for 2015
VOP Nov'15
(Complete members, except for Hanim as she went to restroom. When she's returned, we've done LOL)

If you wish to apply, you need to arrange your schedule as they've only do the interview 6-7 times in a year. I was in November 2015 batch and ours is the wrap up for year 2015. Those who wish to apply must wait till next January. Alhamdulillah, the interview went well and I found that was hilarious. On a second thought, I think it is better for me to kept that as a secret. We, me and Acap attended the interview together. I was being interviewed by Kak Adda and Abang Nazri. FYI, normally they will held a group interview and my roomate Lia advised me to always volunteer so they will impressed with me. Unfortunately, I need to calm as there is a man who get himself volunteer to introduce faster than I am. Nevermind, since Kak Adda noticed me. Yeayyy!! 4 of us, Haizam, Farah, me and Asma has passed the interview.
2 days later, we've got a called telling we passed the interview and we need to attended Volunteer in Petrosains la for sure. What do you expect?

you need to attend 5 days of the Volunteer Orientation Programme (VOP). It's compulsory, well kinda a license to ensure your seat in Petrosains. Unfortunately, I was only attended 3 days of VOP since I've got presentation of BEL and oral test for Japan Language. alhamdulillah. I missed VOP on tuesday and wednesday, which lead me to lost my position in Program Department. I was very frustrated when I was placed in SCEVO. I was told by them, they had a science-experiments-session-while-I-was-gone and sigh. That's how they choose members for Program Department. After the announcement made by Kak Izzi, I rushed to beg Abang Naz. Begging to ask him re-put me in Program and they've said that was the final decision. I need to volunteer for 30 days ahead, then they can place me back in Program. So, I'll be multi task into 2 department after 30 days. So, if nanti kalau korang apply VOP and was put into department that you hadn't wish to be, just bear with it. You can change the department later. I ended up sighing and mourning I wanted to be in Program again again and again till the event is end. Few of them persuaded me. Hanim makes a jokes just to make me laugh and Mus just smiled at me as he know nothing to say to this pathetic girls. deyyyy


Mr Faiz gave talk about stone and I don't quite remember because he brought a lot samples of stones and petroleums. I get myself immersed in taking a pictures with his samples.

Me was holding a rock from Jeju Island in little cute turttle form.

me and Hanim holding  stone samples brought by Mr Faiz. I dont know why is she being weird by throwing up that odd stares, Hanim! The stone samples holding by me is contain nothing while the stone in Hanim's hand is contain petroleum as it has a hole.

well, I'm Holey.
me and minyak mentah. There are few of them smell it and they went TING TONG.


Hanim rushed and she dropped the stones on my glasses. Save the neck it doesn't broke. haiyaaaa laa budak ni
I met chemistry again after 5 years. Oh Yeah, I guess I'm not mising chemistry. On a second thought, Yes, I missed Chemistry!

Me and quater of the batch in Level 42 of KLCC twin tower

For some reasons, I don't really excited for that so called sky bridges visit. We climb (?) up there in a group. Besides us, there is another 2 family from India and Arab with their cute babies. Most of us spent time there by selca. Sigh.

scenery from level 86 KLCC twin tower

Told you I was being a girl who loves selcas.


ET' Department

PETTVO Department

PROGRAM Department.
huwaaaaaaaaaa T.T

see, the evil in Nur Ain Maisaraha fake her smiles. I want to in Program so badly T.T

Last but not least,
Me and the acquaintance during VOP
ME, Lily, Farah and Hanim ( From left)

I wonder why did I didn't struggle 6 years ago. But Still, All praise due to Allah S.W.T as he wanted me to go through this path. Getting out from the comfort zone all by myself, knowing great people all the times and I'd definitely apply into my life when the right time is arrive. There is a friend asking me, either I can manage my time by study and travel go and forth on weekend for part time jobs. and my answer is, Insyaallah. I'll try my best to strive in my degree and perform as a volunteer. I didn't work for money at the first place. It is because I wanted to meet foreigner as many as I can, talk to them in British accent and Korean language and improve my confidence level to use English as much as i curse in malay and mumbles in Korean language.

VOP Batch November 2015

Let's strive!

Monday, October 19, 2015


I've lost a very close friends of mine once during my diploma days back in UiTM Merbok. Well, the actual reason is grouping works and assignments. Me now doing my degree in UiTM Puncak Perdana, Shah Alam and yet I found that kind of "creature" again. Why is it always me? For those who have known me personally know how "kepoh" I am. OHHH great. Wanna hangout with me? Having a cup of tea and Pringles while  catching up some good English movies and Korean's variety show. No problem with that. I can spend the entire weekend with that, honestly.

But, there is one thing I can't ever tolerate, which is not being professional when doing a tasks. I tend to lost my rationality and quite often throw the tantrum upon that. I don't really think yelling and reminding ones over his own tasks will be nice at this age, isn't? Well, you're not longer a kiddos as you need to be told before doing your job by your own. Hey, come on. Be independent! Be tough! No one will waited if you only acted as dumb lazy *ss and only good for nothing.

I felt terribly at lost as I lost few of them because of all those assignment, but they were actually gave me no choices. I was the group leader at that time. There were 6 or 7 of us. I can't simply gave her way out and neglect the other 5 group-mate. I did approached her, and yet she with her endless good for nothing ego lead us all failed. We bear all the consequences. I assumed she is was too arrogant to admit her own mistake even though we try to fixing the things up. 

I grew up. At least for now. There's a girl I know here, I mean in UiTM Puncak Perdana. I really don't want ditch my friends for the sake of good grade score or Dean List award. I rather had my result in moderate as I know I am helping the other friends. How can a person being happy and proud, announcing her good grade score while her friends dying for improving theirs. Why can't you just help the unfortunate friends? Give 'em a hand. Help 'em understand more and strive together. Wait for 'em even though you know they are one step behind us. Wouldn't it'll be the sweetest thing and memorable memories? Why can't it just be in the way it used to be?

I wish I can graduate with a good score together, not alone. I wanted to be succeed, and I wanted all my friends succeed as I am. That is the true happiness. I pray Allah will never let be such an ungrateful servants. Wealth and knowledge is certainly a test and I know I shall not be arrogant with the gifts.

I would rather goes with moderate rather than being succeed alone.


Saturday, October 10, 2015

Nur Ain Maisarah Hwang with her renew obsessions

Salam and Hi.

I'm writing this entry as I started to find an article for Appraisal subjects. see? The devil-ish things couldn't let me through every time I was trying to set the important task on my to-do-lists. One thing people think me odd is when I gave names to my babies. Well, Umi gave he weird look at me when i told adik their names. Then who is on the earth is my babies? 

I prefer my gadgets and books collections as my babies blanc. My housemate Nawal, always read e-novels from her phone. At first I don't really care cause I thought reading through phone can make my eyes's power roses. However, I faced one problem in here. I bought all my favorite Malay novelist's collection and I don't really want bring 'em home. They have to be here, with me. Even though I don't have a time to read 'em all through the entire semester. Ohh, obviously not. Not to be mentions, but if reading all those books and novels will help me score a good grades, I will. haha

I remember the last time I fancy this things( collecting novels, magazines and books) since 2004. Technically, because Umi gave me Ailee (My first laptop ever). So, my obsession towards babie blanc stop pause there. Yeah, I might turn my back over my babies blanc for a while, but they were still in a good shapes. I wrapped 'em in plastic cover and I paste a sticker branding my name for perfect recognition if someone ever try to steal mine. The collections has been made by me since I was 14 years old, so few of my collections went missing as I lend it to the friends.

There's a book rack provided by Uni for each and everyone of us. Lots of people filled up theirs with academic books while mine was full with novels. Same thing goes at home. My wardrobe space's was taken by the babies instead the clothes. What even worsen is I locked up the wardrobe. 
I don't really fancy the borrowing-lending things as I furious. I think I am being paranoid by overthinking peoples doesn't treat my babies in the way I used to. That was pathetic, the feeling. I prepared a cards in each of my babies, so people don't fold any pages of by babies.The cards supposed to be used as bookmarks. Besides, I'm being extremely paranoia as I handle the books with care. 

Mindset of people might be different. I won't say a words against your stand, I will never. But still, one of the most important thing that should be there, in my room at home is my babies blanc. It took me a very long time to gather all the collections together. Seeing 'em was placed in order within the wardrobe and book racks was the best feeling ever every time I went back home. Please babies, be with mama till end will ya?* penampau sedas* 

 p/s: OHHH Yeah. Since the being back as a students ni, maybe I can aim next year's BRIM for Harry Potter series and I am no four.Harry potter collection ada start Philisopher stone till the Goblet of Fire je. PLEASE 

Wednesday, October 07, 2015


Salam and Hi. Being on the second year in the university doesn't really get me excited except for the new baby I had in my life. I named him with "OLLIE" as it was the name one of the most precious person in my life. I pray Ollie will survives long enough to serves me and him, well at least for another 10 years? Insyaallah.

I compressed all the classes's schedule( please prounounce it in British accent if you please) so I will have 4 days of weekends despite 2 days per week. You know me, I am not that kind of people who follow other's footsteps just because I don't wanna be alone in a class. Blimey! I would rather go to class alone by myself instead of having classes on thursday and friday. It was hectic, exhausted and obviously it's killing me. 6 classes strokes in 3 days. Ohh. What else could be great than that? I've got 3 classes on Tuesday starting on 8.00am and the last class end up on 9.00pm. Usually, I don't really have enough time for resting during the day. 

To sum ups the schedule for next week, I guess it will be another hectic week for me. I was startled as next week is already week 6th. UiTM will have 14 weeks of studying periods before final examination. I was like, OHMAIII how come times run faster without I really realize the whole things? It's was like yesterday since the first time I register the courses and the subjects.

  • PC Maintanance test( This is electives subjects and covered 2 chapters for the test) *dying*
  • Japanese online test ( compulsory of each students for taking 3rd language. I was about to registered Korean Language then I was being informed by the staff''s faculty Korean lang only can be taken at Main campus only. I was in Puncak Perdana campus.)
  • Set up a Electronic records systems for Felda( this is Core subject. one of the killer courses)

Seriously, I don't even know why I was ended up here. I was prays that hard, asked the Almight to send me to UiTM Seremban 3 branch so I can continues my degree in the same faculty I used to be during my diploma days. the days I went to watch the movie after doctor has given me MC as I was having fever and gastritis, hangout at pond near to the foodcourt, went out with Aiman, Fatin, Tiqa, Umi and Kak Debab as we used to. The memories lies there forever. I had done all terrible things and those were the days. 

till we meet again, bye.

Monday, October 05, 2015


haa, such a long time since the last time wrote an entries. Currently I'm back into the student's world. The starting for this semester is quite tough and I'm giving my all out. Preparing for TOPIK and IELTS (it must not be named) exams at the same times is giving me headaches. Bloody hell, it was the toughest things to do by teenager adult-to-be. Aunt argued the decision made by me, saying sponsor by any agencies( you name it) wouldn't send me there. Where it is? There are 2 places I wish to settle down in this worlds. It'll be my secrets and it always be.
The second weeks of the semester, the new members of the house look up at me as I'm a queer fish . I stayed at the hostel about 3 days then I went home back in Kota Bharu as Abah's wasn't in good conditions. I have the weirdest thought when I was at home. I was thinking of  extending the current semester as I wanted to be at home. As usual, she (Umi) wouldn't never say a things. It's probably the hardest thing to do by us, spill ones deepest thoughts. Still, I consider myself lucky of having good people surrounded me. And I was like talk to myself " I'll deal with this mess.". I always being positive as I believe life is always about tone of surprises.

gotta a lots of things to be done. I wish I can finish up the whole things before next week. very well, then. till the next time.

stay safe people.

Monday, June 22, 2015


Salam Ramadhan Kareem to all. It's been a while. I guess not, the last time post an update here is about 10 months ago. Well, the promises and Nur Ain Maisarah wasn't get along well, huh. -_-".
This semester is giving me more relax time  compared to last semester, but still I failed to put an update here. I don't even get a chance to understand what is the actual reason for the excuse. by the way, I don't score well in my MUET, so please don't expected I'm using the correct-grammar-term-English and whatsoever. And as for my new friends, do ask me and not get yourself involves with google translate to understand my post. 

Dear author, please get back to the post!!

This would be second Ramadhan for me in Puncak Perdana. As for the last 3 days in a row, me and the Housemate, Nawal had went to Seksyen 13 for our breakfasting. I joke you not, 3 days in a row. The other Housemate, Fatinaz just can only sighing whenever this topic was brought up. 

This the view at Bazar Ramadhan Seksyen 13.

Korean emoticon 보고파 I miss you

Prices for the foods in the Bazar Sekesyen 13 is almost the same in Bazar at our campus. Bazar Seksyen 13 has offered us more and varieties of foods compared to bazar in our campus. The taste is 10 times better I shall say. The cleanliness issues also being guaranteed compare to bazar at our campus.Korean emoticon 내꺼 Mine

Korean emoticon 나 이거 사줘 Buy me that

Look at the "SPAICY" spelling. I've overhead the people's conversation that funny enough to have me burst into loud laugh. Seriously. Alhamdulillah, almost all my wishlist craving-food is all eaten well. 

Nasi Beriani
Kek Batik
Roti John.
Korean emoticon ㅎㅎㅎ heheheKorean emoticon 오키 Okay
p/s: Mom texted me about the measurement for my baju kurung because I didn't bring that-so-called baju kurung contoh during the last time I went home. So, I told her I can just wear last year baju kurung for the Raya's day. And suddenly she stopped texted me. Mood swing merajuk on, I guess. hehe.


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